People want to win in their relationships – it’s a common denominator whether couples are just engaged or have been married for decades. Lucille Williams has experienced this desire firsthand — as a church ministry leader for more than 25 years and a pastor’s wife, she’s heard her share of stories. Lucille draws from these experiences, along with her own now 41-year marriage, to deliver wisdom served with a heaping helping of humor.

Do you realize that every interaction between you and your spouse is either knitting your hearts closer together or infinitesimally moving them farther apart. Like grains of sand being washed away from an eroding beach, one day you could look up and realize the entire coastline of your marriage has changed. Marriage ministry leaders Jill and Mark Savage named that distancing process the “Slow Fade” after a line in a Casting Crowns song that described the drifting that contributed to what they call the darkest year of their now 40-year marriage.

Most of us recognize the familiar whine of a mosquito. Sometimes, the bloodthirsty pests become so irritating they prevent us from enjoying outdoor activities. Just as the pesky mosquito diminishes the joy of a summer evening, so too, do the “mosquitoes” of distraction suck the life out of a marriage, according to the founders of Marriage Matters Now, Inc., Debbie and Steve Wilson.

What could NFL football possibly have to do with marriage? Marriage coaches George and Tondra Gregory could not have imagined at the beginning of their ministry journey that one day they’d be given an opportunity to serve as chaplains to one of the hottest franchises in professional football, helping team members defend against divorce and win in their marriages.

It's rare to find such sage advice from someone so young. Yet the message of 32-year-old speaker and author Ainsley Britain aligns with that of relationship leaders twice her age – albeit translated into modern vernacular that appeals to her audience of teens and young adults. Ainsley’s overall theme is to help people (mainly young women) find their identity in Christ so they can walk confidently forward in the purpose for which God created them.

Where do you look for answers when married life gets tough? You may not know anyone whose marriage has stood the test of time. And even if you did, would you feel comfortable asking them to share intimate details of their lives? People can easily find themselves adrift without role models and end up regretting decisions or behavior. That’s where Rhonda Stoppe steps in. She’s an author, speaker, and podcast host who offers wisdom she’s gleaned during the quarter century she’s worked with couples alongside her pastor husband of four decades, Steve.

Sometimes it seems like a struggling marriage is just so stuck, there’s no way back to a loving relationship. Is it even possible to overcome long standing habits and hurts? Can a couple battle back after the betrayal of infidelity? Sue and Roy Milam, founders of Cornerstone Marriage & Family Ministries, have seen thousands of marriages healed over their almost three decades working with couples and leading A New Beginning intensive weekends.

The vision for the flourishing marriage coaching and counseling ministry founded by Curt and Rhonda Hamner was born on a trip celebrating their 20th wedding anniversary. The couple had spent the previous 20 years following Curt’s pastoral career in Dallas and Southern California and raising three children. Now, as the empty nest loomed, Curt gave Rhonda an assignment in light of the season ahead. He asked her to share the dreams God had given her for their next chapter of life.

Carol Kent was born to communicate. Not only is she a speaker and author herself, but Carol is also the founder and director of the Speak Up Conference, a ministry that equips speakers and writers to share their stories effectively. She’s also president of Speak Up Ministries, an organization that offers MasterMind and intensive coaching on-line groups for writers, speakers, and leaders. With her husband, Gene, Carol started the nonprofit organization, Speak Up for Hope, which benefits inmates and their families.

Where did the romance go? Many couples look up a few years into their marriage (and a baby or two) and wonder what happened. Wives in particular may feel the expectations they had of happily ever after have faded. Their once charming prince has retreated into silence and distance. Both have become so busy with work, family obligations and children they feel like ships passing in the night. Award-winning writer and national speaker Cindi McMenamin inspires women to let God meet their emotional needs, grow stronger through their alone times, and pursue their dreams with boldness.

Mentors make a difference. The gift of walking alongside another can literally change the course of a life. Currently, Jackie Bledsoe is a digital creator, best-selling author and, with his wife, Stephana, a sought-after speaker at marriage events and founder of Happily Married Couples ministry. But in the not-too-distant past, Jackie and Stephana were a struggling couple themselves looking for wisdom and a community to bolster their young marriage and family.

Can a marriage be saved when one of the spouses is a narcissist or emotionally abusive? Would someone even want to save it? Surprisingly, the answer to those questions can be yes, according to David Hawkins, Ph.D. A clinical psychologist with more than 40 years’ experience, Dr. Hawkins has brought healing and restoration to thousands of marriages and individuals since 1976.

Ask those who’ve spent time strengthening marriages and families, and especially as a counselor or in public policy, and they’ve probably heard of Dr. Richard Marks. You might be familiar with his work at Smartmarriages or Christian PAIRS curricula, which he helped develop with mentor Dr. Lori Gordon. Dr. Marks focuses most of his efforts helping deeply troubled couples as they wrestle with how their struggles with trauma, substance abuse, sexual addiction, and general mental health issues affect their marriages.

Who doesn’t want to go on a great date? What is it about the thought of a date that puts a twinkle in someone’s eye? Is it the anticipation of fun, connection, something to look forward to instead of the stress of the world? While the concept of a married couple’s “Date Night” has grown in popularity – even inspiring a movie by the same name, David Arp, MSW and his wife, Claudia, had the idea of dating one’s spouse long before it became “a thing.”

There’s nothing more delightful than to hear your spouse laugh. It’s pure gold knowing the person you love is feeling joy and having fun, say Jay and Laura Laffoon, authors and speakers who create opportunities for spouses to connect and grow as they laugh together. They dub their work “Edutainment,” as they combine education with entertainment during date night events and marriage conferences where they transparently share the messiness of their 35-year marriage.

If you’ve picked up a marriage or family book or study in the past 40 years, chances are good it was either written by FamilyLife co-founders Dennis and Barbara Rainey or published by the ministry. The couple started the fledgling FamilyLife organization in 1976 under the umbrella of Cru (formerly Campus Crusade for Christ). For the next 41 years, God’s favor and the Raineys’ leadership grew FamilyLife into a dynamic and vital ministry that’s equipped millions. People in more than 110 countries around the world now experience the abundant life Christ promises in their marriages and families.

Although the mustard plant has one of the tiniest seeds, its resulting foliage can spread up to 20 feet. So can the smallest happenstance, in God’s hand, bloom with far-reaching implications. The birth of marriage ministry, Strong Marriages, started from one step of faith. Just like many marriage champions, Dewey and Lynne Wilson were asked to mentor a couple from church on the brink of divorce. Although the Wilsons recognized their own marriage was not in the place it needed to be, they felt compelled to try.

There’s something special about great duos. Where would Fred Astaire have been without Ginger Rogers? Or Batman without Robin? The most effective partnerships combine individual strengths for a greater mutual outcome. Such is the dynamism of Brenda and Gil Stuart’s work over the past 18 years helping people with their relationships.

Marriage ministry leaders Mary and Dave Gothi couldn’t have come from more disparate backgrounds. Despite their differences, the two shared a passion for helping couples weather the storms of marital distress. They’ve now been married for 27 years, during most of which they have worked to help couples improve their marriages, and, since 2010, live on mission to make a difference in the world.

Opposites attract. Chances are you and your spouse glossed over a few differences when you were dating. But after several years of marriage, what once seemed innocuous or interesting now has become a source of conflict. Any one of dozens of mismatches can become an irritant that threatens to steal the joy from a marriage. Don’t let an area of incompatibility spark discord yet again.